SEEKING ATTENTION - PITFALLS

This happened a few years ago. I thought of sharing it with you as today in a get together I noticed a girl trying to garner attention of everyone in the group she was in. Though I came into picture at much later stage but I am narrating it as it happened.

Janki was born and brought up in a medium sized town. Her father has successful business and mother is a teacher. She has a brother younger by 5 years. She was good in studies and secured over 90% in final Board examinations. She wanted to study in some reputed college of a renowned university. So it was decided to send her to Delhi as some close relatives are there. So she joined a well known college for girls.

Everything was fine except that she developed inferiority complex because of her upbringing in her hometown. Though she is tall and very good looking but she felt that her sense of dressing and projected image was not upto standards here. So she took to copying those who were popular in dressing as well as appearance. She got into habit of seeking attention of those around her. She did not realize that at times her such efforts drew smiles as well as comments behind her back. This became her nature and she felt neglected if she was not paid attention as she looked for.

During her college time she met a boy who used to travel in the same bus as his college was close by and showed a lot of interest in her. His showering her with compliments used to make her feel very happy. Her friendship with him developed without knowledge of her parents or local guardians. As it happens in such cases he gradually made her submit to his physical demands. This continued till she completed graduation. He moved to another city on getting a good job. She went on to complete MBA securing high position. Her parents agreed to her staying in Delhi and take up a job. She joined a MNC with good salary. She still had habit of seeking attention whenever she felt neglected.

Her habit of seeking attention did not go. A young smart boy and working in the same department noticed this. He started paying compliments on her appearance or work. He also followed her on social networking site giving flattering comments. She developed a liking for him and used to spend free time with him. He was staying with his married cousin in a flat which was quite close to her place. His cousin and his wife were working in reputed companies. He started picking her up in the morning from a set place and drop her back too. Many times they stopped enroute on his say so to have a cup of coffee. She started depending on him for not only attention but convenience too. After a while he took her to his place on some pretext. There she met the couple. His cousin paid a lot of attention to her while his wife seemed friendly. They fussed over her offering tea and snacks. She felt like a princess. This became a routine and she used to visit his flat once a week or so. At times they used to alone. On such occasions he used to be extra attentive and sweet to her. On one such time they became physically involved. She started thinking that he loves her so she did not refuse him whenever he asked her to come with him as they will have flat to themselves. One day when they were there in the bedroom, his cousin came in. By the time she could react she saw that he was taking photographs on his mobile phone. She started crying and asking for forgiveness. Her colleague and his cousin just laughed and told her that they will not tell this to anyone if she submits to both of them. She was so scared that she agreed and while his cousin was with her he took photographs on mobile phone.

That is when her ordeal started for not only satisfying lust of both. His cousin’s wife had gone to her parents as she was in family way. She had to bow to his demand of visiting them on some Saturdays telling her local guardian that she had to go to office.

It was her good luck that her parents found suitable match for her within a couple of months after this and she was married to a boy in Delhi. It just so happened that her husband is son of a person well known to me. He is working at good position in another MNC. His father let her decide if she wanted to continue with job. As she wanted, he made arrangement for her to be taken to office in the morning by his driver and brought back in the evening. This made her contact with that boy less. In office she tried to keep with her other female colleagues.

It was all well for a couple of months but then that boy threatened her with dire consequences if she did not do what he wanted. She refused to bow to his threat.

All hell broke loose when a friend of her husband told him that he had seen an obscene video of her on the web. He was shocked and went into withdrawal mode, even not talking to her. His father sensed there was something wrong but could not put his finger to it. That is when I came into picture. His father called me and asking me to speak to his son. I spoke to him in private and he told me about the said video. On my asking, he told me that he would not like to break marriage as she is good wife and whatever happened before marriage is ok with him if she is not into it now. I told him that I would like to speak to her without any of them except my wife with me. He agreed telling that I should not tell anyone about it. He sent her to our house under some pretext next day. I frankly told her what was the situation and she broke down. After some cajoling she told me all what I have narrated above. I called her husband and apprised him of what had happened. He stood by her as she had refused to bow down to that boy’s blackmail.

With some efforts we got that video removed from that site. I along with him met that colleague and his cousin telling them to stop harassing her. I told the cousin that I will hold him personally responsible if there was any effort to contact her by any of them and I will then narrate the whole thing to his wife who had joined back with the baby a few days earlier. On my advice she changed job after taking leave for a fortnight. Fortunately it stands sorted out.

I narrated this to say that one should not be ashamed of own background. One can make efforts to improve but not make undue efforts to seek attention.