Thursday, September 20, 2012


Hi, I am Vanshika. I am going to be 5 years old soon. Why am I here? Well, I want to ask you why do grown up people fight and make life of children bad. I did not understand earlier as to what is fight but now as I have grown up I can understand.

My Papa and Mummy fight a lot. She says something which makes Papa angry and then fight starts. I feel like crying but my Dadi takes me to her room. I love my Dadi and Dadu as they always help me. They do not say anything when Papa and Mummy are fighting but if it goes on for long then they ask them to stop. My Dadi plays with me like a friend. Dadu puts on computer games whenever I want to play those. Dadi makes me do homework and tells me if I go wrong. I like living with them. I have many friends in our area and in the evening Dadu takes me to park to play with them.

Many times Mummy after fight takes me to Nanu’s house. She takes clothes and my school bag also. We stay there for many days. I go to school from there. Nanu and Nani also love me but it is not as in Dadi’s house. Nanu does not let me play as I want to or touch computer. Maid takes me to park in the evening. Many children come but I miss my friends. I always want to go back to my own house. Why can Papa and Mummy not understand that I become so unhappy at such fights and living away from my own home? Am I not right in asking for my happiness? Are they not supposed to see that I am happy? Why do they not talk peacefully?

Can any of you tell me that?


Ann said...

I don't know this girl but yes I really feel sorry for her. I think her parents must also resolve their issues if not for the sake of themselves but for her sake..

Gayu said...

Hello Uncle
How are you. After a really long time, I am here. The last one month has been very busy with lot of work:)

There are many Vanshika's in real life. Parents mess up their life, but they forget that they indirectly mess up their children's life also. If it's a real story, if you know their parents, I am sure you would talk to them and make them understand.

But very few people understand and as I always say, EGO is bigger than LOVE these days.
Affection is not important, Perfection is ...and in this fight people lose their loved ones...!!

sahara said...

awww,,, parents should understand the consequences of their action their child's mind....
lovely post,

Punam said...

Uncle Jack, kids are most affected by problems of parents, but that is life. And life is very tough. Some kids have to learn it the hard way. If things were hunky dory between the parents, it would definitely be an idealistic situation, wouldn't it? And please do tell me, what is the probability of life being ideal for each one of us?
We dream so many things - do they ever happen? They don't. Every child comes with his/her destiny. So if Vanshika is going through this pain, then how I see it, is that she is better off than many children like her, for she atleast has her dadi and dadu to shield her from the murk. Many don't.

Arnav said...

Thats what happens ... We should realize that having a child is not just about paying for her school and needs. .. its much more than that .

its providing her a happy and safe environment ... We need to understand this and ensure that we have to let go of our ego/dissatisfaction specially for our children.. if its not possible to tolerate then fight in closed rooms not in fron of the kid.. coz then thats what the kid learns than to fight ..

Irfanuddin said...

Jack Sir,
as someone said above "there are many vanishkas around us" and this is unfortunate...:(

lets pray for them and try to understand what our kids feel and how much painful it is for them when they see their parents fighting for sheer reasons.....

RehyaBond said...

Congratulations Jack Uncle :)
You've been awarded the - Versatile Blogger Award!!

Jack said...


I too hope that we realize that we have our duty towards our children too. We need to give up our I, Me and Myself attitude. Take care


I am glad to see you here. Ego is the foremost cause of breakups in relationships and we as fools do not realize it. May God give sense to us. I pray that you remain busy always. Take care


Welcome to my space. I also hope and pray that parents understand that children too need happy and peaceful environments at home for their growth. Take care


I am so glad to see you here. It is not only children but even grandparents in most cases. I have written a post on Grandparents a few posts earlier, please do give your valuable views on that. All couples do have differences, those who say they do not are hiding truth, but we need to be wise to not let EGO come in the way of happiness and peace of a child. Vanshika is not with Dadi and Dadu as her mother has taken her to her parents place. Take care

Jack said...


Welcome to my space. I agree with you absolutely and hope & pray that we all understand this. Take care


It is really so unfortunate that there are many Vanshikas. How I wish and pray that parents understand that need of happy childhood of children is a must and they have to overcome their EGO for this. Take care

R B :

Thanks. This time I will do the needful and try to do for the previous one also. You are so generous. Take care

Shilpa Garg said...

The fights and misunderstandings between parents can have such a big impact on a child's psyche and development! :|

Tranquility Speaks said...

What do I say! Some people just lack good parenting skills. They don't realize that even though children don't say anything, they observe a lot and imbibe a lot from what they see..

Oldfox004 said...

True! Vanshikas are many because EGO is bigger than LOVE but we do not realise what happens to the dependant ones. these are the kids who leave home after they become independent and worst still might imbibe the same approach towards their future spouses.
The bigger role player is karma - to each his own. I would suggest if we come across a friend who has fighting parents at home, we should take care to expose that person to loving parents too, just so they see that not all couples are fighter cocks and that they need not grow up to be one!
Also, it is upto the individual too, to keep an emotional detachment from their selfish, egoistic parents.

Jack said...


What I said in reply to your views in previous post stands for this also. Take care


I feel so honoured that you have given so much of time to read so many of my ramblings and given your views. I have replied to all. I feel that couples should be counselled about art of parenting when they take a decision to have child. Take care


I agree that we get what is due to us due to our KARMA but that does not mean that we stop making efforts to make life happy for everyone. Logically discussion to solve differences is a must after giving up EGO and bring in LOVE. Take care

Amrita Tanmay said...

ईगो की चपेट में हमेशा मासूम बच्चे ही आते हैं.. कोई उनकी नहीं सुनता है..

Jack said...



Take care