SAD, IT IS.

As told in my previous post, I am sharing with you what I had observed.

Most of the days I go to pick up our granddaughter from her school bus stop. Once I got a little late, though was in time to reach there but the bus had come early that day and she was standing at the exit door crying. Since then I give more allowance of time. It is not far but I still take the car as she feels happy. I normally park the car and wait outside. During this time I observe what goes on around. I have come to know how many school buses, with school names, go in the opposite directions or come in the same direction before her bus comes. I know which bus children of our housing complex get down from. Most of the young ones call me DADU as our granddaughter calls me and elder ones call me uncle, as the norm is.  A bus of well known school comes in the same direction almost 10 minutes before her bus. Two girls get down, one of them, say A, is from our complex while other one seems to be her classmate and takes a rickshaw to go home from there. A always stopped to say hello to me as we have a good rapport and I know her parents well.

Since beginning of this month I observed a young boy reached there around the same time as their bus arrived and waited under a tree a little distance away after parking his motorcycle nearby. The girl who comes with A used to say bye to her and go over to the boy. A as usual stopped to speak to me. That boy and girl used to be there when I left with our granddaughter. They though did not indulge in much PDA but it was quite evident that they were going strong in relationship. This was daily routine.

This went on for about a fortnight but then I saw that boy saying something which the girl used to nod her head in disagreement and the boy showed as if he was annoyed pretending to walk off. She used to then hold his hand to make him stay back while said something to please him. On last Monday that boy was not there when the girl arrived. She looked towards that tree and went over. A accompanied her and waited for a while. This girl started crying as it became evident that boy was not likely to come. A tried to  console her and later put her in a rickshaw before going home. The same thing happened for the next couple of days and that girl kept crying mostly. On Thursday when A stopped to talk to me, I asked her as to what was the problem with that girl. A told me that the boy who used to come was her boyfriend and it seemed that he had broken off with her. On my asking she told me that he was in their school but a year senior. He had appeared for 12^th board examinations and was waiting for results. He used to come in the same bus and they used to share seat till he got down a couple of stops earlier. Since reopening of school, he started coming to this stop to meet her. Since I shared a good rapport with A, I told her that I hoped he had not taken advantage of that girl. A told me she would check on that. That day I told in my previous post that I would share an observation with you all.

On Friday she told me that what I suspected was likely to be true as her friend had visited his house on previous weekend because the boy had insisted a lot threatening to break off and he was alone at home.

I really feel so sad for that young girl who has been carried away with her feelings and is now in such a state. This is why I always advocate that it is very important for parents to share friendly relationship with grown up children to inculcate confidence in them to share what goes on in their mind. Parents should be able to guide children as to how to take care of self using language as appropriate to their age. I sincerely wish to speak to that girl and advise that the boy is not worth her as he only lusted after her. I wish to tell her to get over what happened and learn lesson for future. This is the time she needs support lest she takes some drastic step.  But I do not think I will as I do not know the girl. I do offer my help to those I know but I never want to impose myself on anyone. However I have requested A to be of support to her and see that she does not take any harmful step.     

HABIT OF OBSERVING

I have been writing many times on what I had observed during my walks or visit to market etc. I had developed this habit of observing right from my childhood.

 My father was in state government service thus we used to shift to new places on regular intervals. I was about 8 or 9 years old when I got to learn importance of observing things. At that time a police officer was our neighbor. I used to hear almost everyone praising as to how he could foresee and control crime. Once when we were playing hockey in the improvised field near our residence, he joined us. After the game he asked one of his policemen to fetch sweets and soft drinks for all of us. He started talking to us informally advising us to be good in not only studies but other activities also. He then invited us to ask anything we wanted to. I asked him as to how could he foresee things and control crime so effectively as told by so many uncles. He laughed and then on serious note he told that one should always observe things around. He asked me if there were any huge trees close to us. I started looking around. He told me that while I came to that field I should have glanced and observed that instead of looking around now. He further told me that while in market or any place we should observe people around without staring at them. This can help us if something goes wrong.

I learnt that lesson. I started practicing it since then. Afterwards in my career, there were couple of appointments when this became all the more important. This also includes observing facial expressions or body language of persons, in particular ones you speak to, specially while negotiating or finding truth.

My idea of telling this is as there is an incident which I observed recently. I will share in my next post.  

BRAVO BRAVO

I have just got back from market after getting my wrist watch checked and could not wait to share what I witnessed there.

My watch had been showing signs of slowing down so I took it for check up to a watch repairer whom I had known for some time. His shop is very small and one has to stand outside for purchase or repairs. After initial check he told me that it needs a new battery and little cleaning which will take about 15 minutes. So I decided to wait. While standing there I was just observing people going about. There are a number of coaching centers in that market which attract a lot of youngsters who need to prepare for either Board examinations or some qualifying ones for professional courses.

There were 4 young boys standing a couple of yards away from me and chitchatting. I heard one of them say loudly “ Hello, sweetie, want to be friends?” or words like that. On looking I saw a young girl of about 18 or so walking past. She was nice looking, tall and attired as per normal trend in jeans and t shirt. She stopped and approached that group. Now that aroused interest of not only me but some more persons around.

On coming close to those boys, she asked, “ Did you say something to me?”

The boy who had uttered those words was taken aback but after few seconds said,” Yes.” She then told him that she had no objections to be friends if he introduces himself properly. The boy became little bold and told his name. She asked him to tell her about his family and where had he studied as well as what was he planning for his career. He became bolder and told what she had asked for. It turned out that his father is a senior level government officer, mother a teacher and elder sister is doing MBBS. He had completed 12^th from a well known school and was preparing for entrance examination for medical colleges. He had come to attend coaching class at a nearby center.

After hearing all this what the girl said made those boys turn red in face and look around sheepishly. She said, “ With your such impeccable background I would love to friends with you but I will not as you have let down not only your parents, their upbringing, your sister, your such reputed school, noble profession you have chosen but also society as whole by passing unwanted comments like you did as if you were from some disturbed background.” And she just walked off with her head held high. All of us who witnessed this were speechless. I strongly feel that those boys will think a lot before they indulge in such behavior again.

I admire that girl and wish that there are more like her.

STANDBY POST

Restless ( myworldmyperception ) gave me an award with conditions that I follow the rules but being computer semi-literate I need help. So till I get it that will be pending.

Nidhi ( fabulouslittle ) had written a post on her childhood memories, not that she is out of childhood yet as per me, and I while commenting told that this has inspired me to share some of my such memories.

I read some posts here as to why one blogs, I am sorry not to list out those friends as my memory is playing tricks, which inspired me to share my reasons.

Then there is a Tag pending for long long time.

Finding it difficult to make up my mind with so many choices, I have chosen an easy way out. So let me share some humour with you all this time till I take up abovementioned posts.

An elderly farmer got married to a young girl almost half his age. Things went fine for some time but then he had problems. He went to doctor. On hearing his side the doctor advised him that if he was ready he should not wait till evening but to rush back home. For some time this worked. But again he visited doctor saying that by the time he reached home he was not ready. So doctor advised him to ask his wife to come to fields when needed. As there were no mobile phones at that time, he told his wife that he would fire a shot in the air by his gun and she should come to him on hearing that. He did not visit doctor for a couple of months. Doctor met him in the market one day and asked if it was working out. Farmer replied that it was fine for about a fortnight but then hunting season started and he had not seen his wife since then.

An old man of 80 years got married to a woman much younger. His companions for morning and evening walks were fed up with his bragging. One day he announced that his wife was pregnant. There was usual murmur of disbelief but however no one said anything but congratulations. A week or so later one of his companions told that a day prior while walking near a cluster of trees he had seen a rabbit. He further said that he pointed his walking stick at rabbit saying Bang Bang and the rabbit fell down dead. That 80 years old man said as to how could the rabbit die just that way, someone must have fired a shot without his knowledge. The companion said “ Thank God! You see the reality.”

Emperor Akbar had announced hefty award to any poet who could recite an absolutely new poem unheard of earlier. Many poets bid but could not win as one of the persons in his court used to say soon after recital that it was an old poem which he had heard earlier and recite it fully word by word. A young poet approached Birbal asking for advice. He was duly advised. Next day that poet recited his poem and sure enough that man said the same thing reciting the poem. The poet took out a folded sheet of paper which he presented to the Emperor saying that he had recited only half poem while paper had full one. He requested that man to recite the rest which the Emperor could compare with the written one.

This one was told by my grandfather who had been a Headmaster. Once Inspector of Schools had come for inspection. While in one class he asked the students if anyone could guess his age. My grandfather was quite apprehensive when one student raised his hand. On asking he guessed Inspector’s age to be 40 years. The Inspector was surprised and said it was really so. Later my grandfather asked that student as to how did he guess age correctly. The student replied that in his village there was a man of 20 who asked stupid questions and seeing the kind of question Inspector asked he felt that he must be double the age of that man.

MUST LIVE WITH TIME

Last Saturday evening we had gone to my cousin’s house. He was out of station. His wife was home. She told us that their son had gone to market with wife and son to purchase to purchase pair of new school shoes for him.

We just started catching up with news of other relatives whom we had not met for some time. After about fifteen minutes or so she remarked that does it take 2 hours just to purchase a pair of shoes as their son has been away for that long. I told her that may be they were doing some more shopping. She said that I do not know what goes on and my wife being a woman would understand it better. She added that their daughter in law was slowly taking charge of house. She further added that in the morning she cooks for lunch before going to office and instructs her maid to prepare dinner. This lady is about 4 years elder to me. My reply was as to why did she not look at it this way that her d i l wanted her to take it easy at this age as her grandson would surely make her tired with his pranks after return from school. When I asked if she felt ignored or neglected, her reply was “ NO “. So I told her to think positive.

Their son along with wife & young lad of about 5 years came back in next 10 minutes or so. They had brought a lot of household utility items including a blood pressure monitoring gadget as she suffers from high BP. Her d i l after usual paying respects rushed to kitchen to ensure that we would have tea with some snacks. When I looked at my cousin’s wife, she looked sheepish.

This incident set me thinking as to why we do not look at positive side and also that a time comes when we need to gradually hand over charge to younger generation, isn’t it?