UNFORTUNATELY THIS HAPPENS

About six months I was involved in start up of a project for spreading education and skill development for women in rural area. I was representing NGO I am consultant with. The project was sponsored by a well established corporate as its factory was located in that area. Ten odd surrounding villages were covered under the project. My interaction was with a young lady of that corporate who was responsible for CSR. She is in mid 20s, well educated with professional degree in mass communications. We met a number of times to work out modalities and also visited the site together. The project was launched after a month or so of preparations. Thereafter we met regularly at least 3 to 4 times a month to review progress and also visited site as needed. We developed a nice rapport and she started calling me Uncle. I treat her as family member. She speaks freely with me about anything and asks my advice on various issues. She has visited our home a few times. I have met her parents. We have developed a nice friendship. They are worried about her not consenting for marriage. I asked her a couple of times but she did not give any specific reply. I had even told that if our son was unmarried I would have taken her into our family as his wife.

Last week she asked me to help her. She told me that she had been in love with a boy but he had got married to someone else under parent’s pressure. I am going to narrate what she told me in her words with some moderation of language used by her:

“I met him little over a year ago at a party thrown by my close friend. He was known to her from college. He is 6 footer with athletic build, fair with very pleasing manners. We liked each other and exchanged our phone numbers. We met few times thereafter before he confessed his love for me. I too had strong feelings towards him as he never had behaved in any unwanted manner. As we both had busy working life, we used to meet on weekends but spoke many times daily. On meeting we used to mostly visit restaurants or his club. We started going for movies after a month or so. He used to put his arm over my shoulders or at times hold my hand. I was quite comfortable with this or rather I liked it. It was during a very romantic sexy English movie that he pulled me close to him and kissed me on the cheek. We were in the last row with not too many people around. I felt little shy but was excited also. As I did not resist, he kissed me a few more times before he planted a kiss on my lips. I was scared but the experience was intoxicating. After few kisses I also started responding by kissing back. This carried on throughout the movie. When we came out, I was blushing. He kept his arm around my waist and guided me out of crowd to his car. We went to restaurant and later he dropped me close to my house. When I was alighting from the car he asked for good bye kiss which I responded to. Thereafter we hugged and kissed whenever we found opportunity. He had promised that he would not do anything without my consent. I had full faith in him as he had been a thorough gentleman all the time. I am not a child and have my own feelings & urges. I enjoyed his attention. I fantasized and played with myself at times when alone after our long kissing sessions.

A few weeks later he suggested that we watch our choice movies in his flat by taking CDs. It seemed alright as we had become very attached to each other. We took cold drinks and some snacks while going to his flat. It is one bedroom with drawing dining room flat. I was very impressed to see it neat & tidy which I did not expect as he used to stay alone. Once there we made ourselves comfortable in the bedroom as the TV & CD player was there. We sat side by side on the bed. As the movie progressed we did a lot of kissing. I was very excited and did not stop him when he started fondling my breasts over my shirt. I agreed when he asked if he could remove my shirt and bra for more intimacy. I jokingly told that I would feel shy being the only one topless. He laughed and removed his shirt & vest also. We had almost forgotten the movie. He hugged me close to his chest which tickled me due to his being so hairy. His kissing and caressing my breasts aroused me sent shivers down my spine making me very excited. I just nodded my acceptance when he looked askance while unzipping my jeans. We both were soon naked. He kissed me all over caressing me at my sensitive parts. His manipulations raised my arousal to very high pitch. There was no stopping after that. He parted and bent my legs at knees but while he positioned himself kneeling on top of me, he asked if no objections to make love. I feebly told him to go ahead.

Our having sex became a regular after that. He assured me that it is matter of time before we get married as he was going to speak to his parents on next visit home. It was a real shock when he told me a month ago that his marriage has been fixed by parents to another girl from his home town. He told me that he cannot go against their wishes as that would jeopardize marriage prospectus of his two younger sisters. He has returned last week with his wife. He contacted me to tell that he does not love her but has to stay with her. He professed his total love for me and wants me to continue our relation as earlier. I cannot say no to him as I am deeply in love with him inspite of all this but at the same time I am aware that it is not right for his wife or me also. I have not met him still though my desire is very strong. I am in dilemma and want advice from you.”         

I have advised her to wake up from dreams and face reality. I have told her not to keep any contact with him at all and tell him bluntly not to call her up or make efforts to meet her. I have told her to avail leave for a fortnight or so as well as change her mobile number. If she feels she may even look to change her job. If he makes any threats to her, she should let me know and I will speak to him. She has promised me to follow this but does not wish me to tell anything to her parents. She told me that she will keep in touch with me regularly.

I have shared this as some of you may need this as reminder that everything is not like fairy tales.