Tuesday, August 10, 2010

HOW MUCH TO LOVE YOUR CHILDREN

Siddharth was born after a lot of prayers and what not by his parents and grandparents. His parents had two daughters before him and wanted a son very desperately. The age gap between him and second sister was 12 years. So you can well imagine joy he must have brought to his parents and grandparents on his arrival in this world. They gave him all the attention and pampered him so much that right from his childhood he considered himself to be a gift to humanity. Relations between him and sisters were not so cordial as most of the time they were at the receiving end for crimes against him as per his statements without any cross check. He just got used to get what he wanted and the way was not any consideration. He even used to become violent at times when denied what he wanted. He was little above average height and good looking.

His grandparents were very disheartened at the way he was growing up. During his final years in school they tried to make him have some sense but he retaliated with so much of rudeness that they just went into shell. This depression caused them to depart this world one after the other in a space of just five months. He barely graduated after number of attempts as he loved going to college which gave him a chance to show off his latest acquisitions and have a number of girlfriends. As he was to step into his father’s shoes to run business, it was not considered that he study anything more. That is the kind of man he grew up to.

He started going to office under compulsion of his father who was keen that he learn about business to take over in a few years. He had to show interest in office lest his father stops giving him what he wants. But his heart was in having fun. So after office it was pubs with friends. It was well known that if he fancied a girl he made all out efforts to make her his girlfriend and as soon as he felt bored with her he dumped her. His mother was not very happy but could not do much. His sisters were both married and did not visit parental house often as they were happy in their respective homes. They were not keen to be with him due to his behavior which had made them face ire of parents when they were there.

He developed attraction for a girl, Roshni, working in the office as Business Development Officer. All his efforts to woo her failed. Even subtle threats about job conveyed through a crony of his in the office bore no fruit as she just told that she would rather resign than to be his friend. She was quite good looking. She was from a middle class family which he had found out through his sources. He got so obsessed that he forced his mother to get him married to her.

For a month or so after marriage it seemed that he had become a totally different person. Roshni was not going to office any more though his father had plans to give her some major responsibility at a later date. But it was not long lasting. As the novelty of marriage wore off and he had had what he wanted he was back to his old self. He again started visiting pubs with his friends, of course new girls too. Roshni tried to reason it out with him but he just told her to mind her business. He even slapped her once in presence of his mother. She sided Roshni and he even told her to keep out of it.

His father had heart attack. Though he survived but was confined to bed due to paralysis of lower limbs. Now he had the whole world to himself with no one to check him. His escapades got wilder with business being neglected. His father was not told anything initially but as he showed signs of improvement his mother put him in picture. He called for his lawyers and made Roshni Executive Director of the company with all powers. Siddharth was director but with no control over major issues. He was very upset and threatened to go to court but did not as he was advised that it would be of no use. He started drinking all the time and spending time with new girls. He almost stopped going to office. She grasped nuances of business very well and fast with guidance from her father in law. She was well liked and respected due to her humane approach. She gave due respect but was strict also without being arrogant.

His behaviour got worse and whatever time he was home he always kept shouting at his parents. He used to threaten her with dire consequences. He became well known in the whole city for his acts after drinking. One day late at night someone known to them called up to say that he is making a nuisance of himself at a pub. Roshni went alongwith their trusted help and driver to bring him back. On arrival she found him to be very aggressive. When she approached him, he shouted at her calling her all kinds of names. She requested him to calm down and come with her to go home. He used very abusive language telling her to go away. When she held him by the arm to guide him out of that place, he pushed her away with force making her fall. He then picked up a chair hitting her repeatedly. One of the persons in the pub called up police and he was arrested red handed. She sustained fracture of leg. The whole thing was caught on CCTV.

She took a stand to let him face the legal action. His parents supported her. He was locked up but was out on bail given by some rivals of his father. They even put him up in a hotel and paid for fees for lawyers. The investigating office of police was a honest person who took charge of CCTV footage and had recorded evidence of all available witnesses. The case went on for a long time but with all the strong evidence he was found guilty. He was sentenced to 3 years of rigorous imprisonment. He obtained bail and appealed against it but in due course of time his appeal was rejected. The persons supporting him realized that it was futile to back him as the evidence was clinching. Even in jail he tried to show his bossy nature but was badly beaten up by fellow prisoners.

Roshni and his mother visited him in jail but initially he refused to see them. Over a time he realized that there was no one who cared for him and all his friends had deserted him. So he started meeting them. A year in jail made him a changed person and he started regretting his past. His father improved but still did not go to office preferring to work through Roshni. They all hope that once he comes out of jail, he would have learnt his lesson and be a better person. His father still does not want to hand over reins of business to him but keep those with Roshni. He understand it and agrees with it.

The idea of telling this was that we should love our children but not pamper them to an extent that they become demons for us. Right values must be inculcated alongwith love.

19 comments:

Aman Rayjada said...

True that!

I love the the fact that in your posts adequate background details are given which make the reader empathise with the subject.

Now,I really don't know if these are true stories or simply pure works of fiction, but these are so lively that it makes one think that it has been picked out straight from the lives of someone you might have crossed on the street an hour ago.So simple and true.

Again, I love the way you write and your concern reflects.

Ellen said...

You're a wonderful storyteller, Jack. And you inject your insights with such clarity and profound understanding. Thank you for sharing this enlightening piece with us. God bless.

Raj said...

you are a blessing to good subtle strong philosophy.
good work sir.
enjoyed reading it :)

Sonshu said...

I love all your writings! on various topics! they're so realistic! and awesome!

ritika said...

Jack uncle!

True, You are a superb story teller, Do start writing a book, it ll be a big hit! i love the issues you bring in!

Ur experience speaks in your blogs!!

Awesome!

maverick said...

thts a nice story...and it is so very relevant in todays changing n fast paced world

beingdena said...

what a great story, where did you find the inspiration to write this?thank you so much for sharing your writing with us and the wonderful birthday card you sent me.

Dena x

Jack said...

AMAN :

Most of my writings are based on incidents I have seen myself while the rest are on inputs given by some very dear friends who are reliable. I try to bring out the consequences of such acts to the knowledge of readers. Take care


ELLEN :

I try to make it simple for grasping the follies of such acts so we may avoid the same.
Take care


RAJ :

Thanks for appreciating my effort. If someone is benefitted by my telling such incidents, I will feel my efforts were fruitful. Take care


SONSHU :

Thanks a lot for supportive comment. Take care


RITIKA :

I make efforts to bring out what ails our society so we can overcome it for a happy and healthy life. Thanks for your suggestion. I will try to do what you say. Take care


MAVERICK :

Welcome to my space. Thanks for supportive comment. I look forward to your views on my older posts too. Take care


DENA :

It is so nice to see you here. My efforts are to bring out some sad happenings which could have been avoided had the persons involved applied their mind properly. You are welcome. That was the least I could do. Take care

Chandrika Shubham said...

Interesting story with a moral.

Sakshi said...

The parents love unconditionally, that is a BIG BIG fact. But what really caught me here was not that he was pampered- But the fact that because he was a boy he was pampered. I think that here is where the whole crux of the matter resides. Had he been treated as an equal- Things would have been different. This is not only one case, but there are many such cases wherein the boy is pampered because of his gender. The thinking needs to change at the root too!!!

EM said...

Hi uncle,

I loved it!

smiles,
-eera-

Cherry Blossom said...

The story is told in a beautiful sequence of events which keeps the reader glued to the text. Its very true that love should have its limits and not be so benevolently overpoured that it generates a malevolent character.Parents should keep in mind that their offsprings need a balanced and stable upbringing. A spoilt child will be a nuisance in future and, in order to avoid that, parental training should start right from childhood. Children should always be taught to keep a low profile and for that matter, parents should play an influential role.

BROKEN STAR said...

grt teaching..thanks a lot!!

Jack said...

CHANDRIKA :

Thanks for visit and supportive comment. Take care


SAKSHI :

That was one of the points which I wanted to make. At the very beginning I had said how badly his parents wanted a son. We need to understand that there should be no difference meted out in love to girl or boy. As a matter of fact girls are more dependable and caring. Take care


E M :

It gives me happiness to see you here and know that you liked it. Take care


C B :

Parents need to inculcate good values by example and love. No difference should be made beween daughter or son. As children grow up parents need to take on role of elderly friend instilling confidence in children to share their thoughts. Take care


B S :

Nice to see you here and with such support. Take care

Librangirl said...

I agree!

Jack said...

L G :

I am so happy to see you here. Thanks for agreeing. Take care

Jigyasa said...

I love the way you put up a case....and I am thankful that you share so usual yet ignored facts of routine life...

I hope he turns out to be a better person and God Bless Roshni!

Keep Smiling Uncle J.

Happy Independence Day!

Jack said...

JIGYASA :

Nice to see you here. I share my experience or thoughts with a hope that may be someone will be benefitted from this. If so, I will be so happy.

Take care

A Restless Mind With A Sensitive Heart! said...

I think this what is happening in the educated middle class. that desire to have a boy child is so strong, as if their breed will perish, if they don't have a boy!

And yes, normally this is what ppl believe, have money let your kids enjoy, without your kid knowing the value of money, obviously he will be spoilt.

It doesnot stop there. Even after marriage, sons behave like kings.

your story was good, Jack, but the only thing, I don't believe, which is too good to be true, is that parents helped the Daughter in law to get their son behind the bars. Parents can not do it, emotions, do not do it, social pressure, and that is for sure.

But if they do, somehow spoilt brats will learn the lesson.

Parents love should be unconditional but kids should learn to earn it.

Very well written.

In fact, I am going to start a blog for kids and youth, having poems, essays and articles for and by kids. would love aaguest post by you then.

Take care!

RESTLESS