Tuesday, February 23, 2010


Tongue –fu Lady ( wellmylifemyway) in her post “Emosanal Attyachar” had written that a person falls in love due to feeling of loneliness. She had given logical reasoning. This post is not to contradict her. Her post set me thinking what is love and how does it happen. In my comment to her post I had said that I would write a post on this. Unfortunately I got busy as a very close friend of mine had some problem and was very depressed. I had to spend time with him to see that he does not take any unwanted step. Now that he is in much better frame of mind, so here I am with post I promised. I will share with you about his problem later in a post.

There have been numerous persons who have written either in verse or prose about love and have tried to tell what is it. And there are many more who are doing it even today. They all talk about ROMANTIC LOVE, like that of Romeo & Juliet, Laila & Majnu, Heer & Ranjha and the like. In my opinion LOVE is an emotion which leads to a strong bond between two bodies. Why I have not said “ Persons” is because I have been saying many a times that LOVE is of many hues. Just to name some love relations – Parents love for children and vice versa, siblings love, friends love, love for pets, love for country, love for one’s vocation, love for one’s organisation etc etc. And what we mostly think when love is mentioned is the ROMANTIC side. So I will confine this post to that category.

Now having tried to say what is LOVE, let me explore how does it happens. Initially it is just attraction. One sees some one who appeals to his or her eyes then he or she wishes to get introduction. Once they meet it takes a little time for feelings of love to surface if the conduct of the person is likable. As the time progresses his or her love gets reciprocated due to behavior to make good impression. Some may call it love at first sight but I maintain it is attraction which turns into love with time.

Having given my perception of falling in love, let us see what are the types of love one may feel. First is physical yearning which is nothing but LUST. Once that gets fulfilled, love takes a back seat. Next is POSSESIVE , in this the person wants to control his or her partner’s life. This leads to a lot of differences and in most case the one loved so feels suffocated and desires to break free. Last is TRUE or PURE love in which you wish to share all happiness or things of life with him or her. There will be certain amount of physicality but that does not become prime reason. One feels to spend time with his or her beloved. Everything seems rosy and dreamy when in company of each other. Anjuli (maybeiamaddicted) has described it in her post “Are movies reflection of life” very aptly saying that in such love one does not want “ Him or her to be mine” but wants “self to be his or her”. I have taken liberty changing the exact words but essence remains the same. If you have this feeling, you have achieved what many keep wanting. And such feelings do get rewarded. I am sure she will find this kind of love.

I am grateful to both the young ladies for their views on love and hope they do not mind my using their thoughts. Another young lady who needs mention is Ki as her posts on relationship showed a lot of maturity for a girl so young as she, I do not know where has she disappeared to.

May I request you all to add to these thoughts of mine?


Sakshi said...

Love, is each to his own. It is God to some, money for the other... It has more of the heart and lesser of the brains.
It is a part of your life, and not life itself.

Tongue-fu Lady said...

love is a puzzle.. the answer is simple yet we are blinded by the complexities of life..
i wish someday all of us can love like a child does..

thank you, Jack, for adding a different perspective to my post.

in search of ...... said...

i dunno how one can define love....its different for each individual but than it has its meaning for each person seperately....thr cud be many types of love.....as u said...but still i feel tht it cannot be defined n the one which can be defined is not love....i have wriiten very few post n the first one was on love...if u have time do read...

Arnav said...

Love - Ah ! Its a feeling that can make you smile in the gravest of situations , it is something which is the Shining light in the darkest of times... It is the feeling which makes us believe that there is purpose of life..a feeling which makes us proud of what we are :)
Its something which cannot be articulated because like human mind its highly complex !

I do also believe that Love is not the feeling of accomplishment, it is not about achieving. It can never be forced on or off a person,It’s not about reciprocation Instead It’s a beautiful feeling which comes in the right time, right place for the right person.

It’s a feeling that makes us smile and wish happiness for the person we love even if that results in tears in our own eyes.

Amrita said...

Well i first read her post and though the facts she has put in are correct sometimes and the facts you have put in are also correct sometimes i still feel there are lots and lots and lots of layers and different perspectives to it and each couple will have a different reason for being together.. even i think i could write a post on this thot provoking topic!

Jack said...


Aw, I wrote this post in haste as it was long pending and missed out on you. Love can not be defined or calculated. It can only be felt by one who falls in love. We can make efforts to define it and so was mine. Take care

T-f L :

Nice of you to visit and appreciate my effort. It is a puzzle and we all can make efforts to solve it in our own ways but it still remains a puzzle. Take care


I visited your space and read your post on LOVE. If love was not a mystery, would it be what it is - mind you I refer to Romantic one only. We all can make efforts in our own ways to solve it but it will still remain a beyond defining. Take care


Yes, LOVE is that heady feeling which can only be understood by one who had been hit by cupid's arrow. It is not an accomplishment or achievement but is when you feel sense of giving happiness to the one you love. Take care


Since times immomerial we humans have tried to define LOVE and this is my effort. I agree it differs from person to person but I have tried to put across that it is an emotion which is very strong making a person do wonders. Take care

Amrita said...

Jack - you have been tagged

Tranquility Speaks said...

I really liked your perspective on this topic. Lust fades away, love takes a back seat, but in the long wrong, I think, the love that isn't the prime focus, holds the strings of the relationship together :)

Jack said...

TRANQUILITY :I am sorry I am little confused by what you said " but in the long wrong, I think, the love that isn't the prime focus, holds the strings of the relationship together." Kindly elucidate.

Take care