Let us bid adieu to June hot days and welcome July rains with a smile :
Wife called up her husband in office “ Darling, our car is just not starting.”
Husband, with his mind in work “ What seems to be the problem? ”
Wife “ I think there is water in the carburetor. ”
Husband “ OK, where is the car now? ”
Wife “ In our swimming pool. ”
Two cars collided at an intersection around midnight as both the drivers seemed to be in hurry to get to their destinations. Though the cars suffered extensive damage both the drivers were lucky to come out without any injury except being shell shocked. One of them, who was lawyer, looked at the cars and said “ How lucky we are to be alive. ” The other, a doctor, replied in shaken voice “ Yes, looking at the damage no one will believe we are alive.” The lawyer pulled out a bottle of whiskey from his car, unscrewed it and offered to doctor “ Let us have a swig to soothe our nerves.” The doctor took the bottle with shaking hands and took a gulp. As he offered it back, lawyer told him “ Have another good one, you seem to need it.” The doctor took one more and handed the bottle back. On seeing the lawyer putting the cap back he asked “ Are you not going to have one? ” The lawyer said “ I will wait till police arrives.”
Once a very very rich man wanted to start some charitable institution. He along with some other board members was interviewing people for CEO’s job.
He asked first candidate who was a teacher “ What is 2 plus 2 ? ” The teacher looked surprised and answered “ 4 ”.
Next candidate was a statistician. For the same question he replied “ As majority of persons in a survey would say 4, so it should be 4. ”
Next was a philosopher who after pondering over the question for a while scratching his head replied “ I think it would be somewhere between 3.9 and 4.1” .
Next was a Chartered Accountant who on hearing the question signaled them all to be quiet. He got up went to the door, peered outside, closed the door, went to window and shut it. On coming back he whispered “ What do you want it to be? ”
Liz came back home on Monday after having been away for Sunday to visit her ailing mother. On asking her 4 years old son if all was ok in her absence. He said “ Yes, dad took care of everything well and in the afternoon when I was sleeping I heard some noise in dad’s room. On peering inside I saw him and Jill aunt doing …” . At this point she told him to be quiet and tell all when she asks later. When her husband returned from work in the evening, she called the boy asking him to tell what he was saying in the morning. The boys said “ Yes, dad took care of everything well and in the afternoon when I was sleeping I heard some noise in dad’s room. On peering inside I saw him and Jill aunt doing what you did with Tom uncle when dad was away for few days.”