FOOD FOR THOUGHT

I avoid writing about religion or politics as a rule but happenings in the recent past have made me make an exception to that self imposed rule.

I firmly believe that religion is an individual’s choice. It is in ones heart and there is no need to show that one is very religious. God is one and it is we who have given different names to pray in the way we want to. God is not deaf. A silent prayer said from heart reaches God rather than all the noise we make in our unwanted efforts to send our request to God. We project ourselves as followers of whatever religion we believe in but indulge in acts which no religion would ever preach. Unfortunately some leaders with eye of what they can gain misguide the gullible youth in the name of religion. Can anyone enlighten me if there is any religion which preaches violence against unarmed, old, women or children going about their normal duties? Don’t we think that any person who does this needs to be penalized? I know our police has earned notoriety by indulging in corruption, favoritism and fake encounters to please bosses – political mainly. Police reforms is another subject which needs to be paid attention by each and everyone of us. Even keeping shortcoming of police in view, does it make us correct in supporting one who has indulged in such ghastly activities against humans? I know that it is difficult to come to terms that our near and dear one may be wrong but we should think with open & logical mind for the sake of humanity as whole.

Politics, we all know is dirty as we have been hearing about this right from our childhood – family politics, society politics, school politics, college politics, office politics etc etc. I have very serious doubts if any political leader ever thinks of what nation needs for progressing. In my opinion each & everyone of them first think of themselves, then kith & kin followed by party and in such cluttered mind there is no space for national interest. All they see is CHAIR and how to garner votes to get that. Do they ever think rationally about what they do, misuse of authority or power by promising what not, just to get votes may damage the fabric of nation. Again who is to blame for this -  WE the people who accept all this with attitude HOW DOES IT MATTER TO ME?

Food for thought, isn’t it? 

WE COME ALONE AND GO ALONE ALSO

Every morning I think that I must get back to writing but visits to doctors, keeping track of medicines timings ( not only for self but my wife also ) and our dog keeps my mind in spin. There are a lot of ideas which generate as I observe so many happenings around when I take our dog for walk or visit market as I still continue shouldering my normal responsibilities as much as I can. These activities keep me tired not only physically but mentally too. Then the situation I am facing or rather we are facing makes me feel more so. Anyway one has to face what life throws.

This makes me firmly believe that one has to face whatever be it at ownself, though there are close ones, relatives as well as friends, who offer support and sympathies but at the end of the day it is one who has to do what needs to be done for own happiness or well being. They may offer physical help or suggest ways to overcome stress but one has to control own mind from wandering off to negative side. If one wishes to have stressfree life one needs to keep positive attitude for a start. One needs to take health issues as those are and take precautions plus medicines as prescribed by doctors. Next one needs to have an open mind and think of whatever happens from point of view of one whom one may blame for such events. That is the way to understand whys and hows. A frank logical talk with other person helps if that person also wishes to resolve the issue. Remember that we come alone to this world and go alone also.

Well, enough of GYAAN ( preaching ) for the day, isn’t it?     

ISN'T THIS POSSIBLE?

OMG, it is one month since I wrote anything and hardly visited my friends here. Let me try to make up for that.

I had started writing this post before I became unwell, so in all fairness I thought I should complete it.

“ I was very small, may be just a few weeks old, when I was separated from my mother and siblings. When I had opened my eyes and saw the world, I realized that we were 5 siblings. We all were black like our mother and looked alike but only I had white patch on my tail. We used to snuggle upto our mother who used to feed us with milk. We all squirmed to get in better position. It was just a day after I had started seeing everything that I was picked up by giant of a person and taken away.

At my new home there are number of other persons around who squealed in delight on seeing me tumbling around but I missed my mother and siblings. These persons look funny as they are big in varying sizes and walk on their hind feet. There is only one small one who walks on all fours like me and he keeps chasing me all the time. A few days ago he also has started standing on hind feet, though falls down often. When he takes tumbling steps on hind feet, all big ones make lot of noise clapping. Even I made efforts to stand on hind feet to please them. I have learnt to do so after a lot of effort but for a short while. At such times those near me laugh and offer me my favourite tidbits. They all pick me up often and cuddle me making funny sounds. I found that if I reciprocated by wagging my tail I am mostly rewarded with some tidbits which I like. Now I have got used to them and have started enjoying my time.

They have even made a soft place for me to sleep. Water in a pot is kept next to it and also another one in which they put things for me to eat. They give me tasty food and milk also. They never let me go out at my own. Always someone puts something around my neck with a rope in it before taking me out for walk. At times they remove the rope and play with me on the grass in front of the house. Life seems to be happy presently. “

Don’t you think your pet may be having such thoughts?

YOUR SUGGESTIONS, PLEASE.

Ramesh and I were classmates in school during our final years. That time it was Higher Secondary , 10 + 1. Both the final examinations, for 10^th as well as 11^th , were conducted by University unlike CBSE now. Though after school we parted ways to go for whatever career we chose but remained in touch even when we were in different cities. No mobiles or internet e-mails but good old Inland letters through Postal Department. We met at least couple of times a year. After I retired and settled in Delhi we had opportunity to meet more often as he too is settled here. We live in different localities but that did not deter us for meeting at least once a week in club. Needless to say that we were together on special occasions in each family.

Like us they also have two children , elder being daughter and younger a son. Daughter was married about 14 years ago and went off to USA with her husband. She had just completed graduation then. She took up higher studies there and  started working thereafter. They visited annually in the initial stages but later once they had children it became little infrequent due to their own commitments. Ramesh and his wife visited them a couple of times, last being about 4 years ago. They too like us believe in letting children have their own life without any interference but support as required.

Their son, Pawan, dilly dallied and consented to marry early last year. Ramesh had told him to let them know if he was keen on someone but the boy left it to parents to select. They found a girl from family with similar background. He insisted for son to meet the girl and decide. So Pawan and Disha met after office hours and spent an hour or so together in a Coffee House. They both consented. They got married in March last year.  Of course, all of us attended the wedding.

A couple of months later I found Ramesh to be in a little pensive mood when we met in club. During third such meeting while we were sipping beer I asked him why he seemed lost in his thoughts. That is when he shared something which I least expected.

He told me that Disha was not yet settled down inspite of their best efforts. She had been told by him as well as Pawan before marriage that they all would be together as a family and she was most welcome as new member. She was advised that if she faced any difficulty she should not hesitate to share it. He told that she had been insisting for Pawan to move out and live independently. He added that her father seemed to be interfering as he also had told Ramesh a couple of times to let Pawan & Disha live at their own. He said that his reply was straightforward that it was upto Pawan to decide and they would not interfere. Pawan had categorically stated that he would not leave his parents. He said that this caused undue tension between the young couple which affected the harmony of the house. He said that he and his wife were keen to see Pawan & Disha happily settled. They were thinking how to ensure that without making any outward show of it.  He asked me for advice. We discussed some ways including frank talk with her in presence of her father but ruled that out. Ultimately I told him to take his own decision after giving thought to every aspect.        

A week later he told me that he had informed Pawan that their ancestral property at native place was likely to be usurped by tenants due to their neglect and their presence is a must to save it. So he with his wife would be moving there in a week or so. Though Pawan suggested that they make frequent visits there to oversee the property but he insisted to shift there for some time. So they moved to native place leaving Pawan and Disha independent in the house here. We went to see them off when they drove away. Pawan kept in touch with me on regular basis, calling up at least once a week. They also visited us at times.

After couple of weeks of shifting there, Ramesh started a remedial school. The idea was to keep children from underprivileged class, who mostly go to state run schools, interested in studies by revising what had been taught in school and help them to do home work. As per him a lot of such students are taken off studies by parents once they fail a couple of times and made to work. He charged a meager amount of Rs 20 pm from students but put such funds back into school by giving them stationary or books as well as snacks.  His efforts are bearing fruit and they have a large number of students.

Disha is friendly with a young lady, Simi, in her office. She did not know that Simi stays in a housing complex close to ours and is known to us. Her father in law and I had been together in one of the organizations and keep in touch. Simi alongwith her husband and young son of 3 years are with his parents, my old colleague. It was only when Ramesh had confided his problem in me that I learnt the organization Disha worked in. So I requested Simi to keep an eye on her but without letting my name out. That is when she told me that Disha is already friendly with her and confides a lot in her. She told me that even before marriage Disha used to talk of having an independent life and used to wonder as to how did Simi stay with in laws. Simi said that she has been telling her that it is a boon to have elders with you as they are such a support in every way. On Disha’s saying that there would be so much of interference, she told that it is upto those involved to develop trust by mutual understanding and adjustments. She also told me that Disha’s father interferes a lot.

Last week Pawan told us that Disha is in family way and there are some complications. Doctor has advised her not to strain herself much. She wanted to shift to her parents place and wanted Pawan also to shift as she did not want to leave him alone. He refused. Then she asked her mother to be with her but she showed her inability as she did not want to leave husband and son alone. So now she wanted Ramesh and his wife to come back. Pawan had spoken to him but Ramesh showed reluctance due to his running remedial school.  Pawan wanted me to persuade his father to come back.

What do you suggest Ramesh and his wife should do? Should they abandon students who are doing well in their respective schools and come back? It is felt that once Disha’s need is over she would again want them to go away.

In my opinion Ramesh may keep looking after school and visit on alternate week ends while his wife may come back to take care of Disha. I know it will be a strain on both of them.

SO RIGHT, ISN'T IT?

I am sorry that I have not been able to regularly visit my friends here for a long time nor I have written something worthwhile. It is not just the physical well being which is causing this , that I have to live with,  but I am also under a tremendous emotional stress for the past four months or so due to some factors which some of you are aware of. May be I will share that with you all here to let it off my mind. Please bear with me.

 I read this story recently and felt that I should share this with you all.

One should always be Willing To Learn Throughout The Life

One truck driver was doing his usual load delivery at a mental hospital, by parking his vehicle beside an open drain. He discovered a flat tyre when he was about to return from the mental hospital. He jacked up the truck and removed the flat tyre to fix the spare tyre.

When he was about to fix the spare tyre, he accidentally dropped all the 4 bolts in the open drain. As he cannot fish the bolts in the open drain, he started to panic as to what should be done?

Just then, one patient happened to walk past him and asked the driver as to why he was looking troubled. The driver thought to himself, since there is nothing much he can do or this mental joker can. Just to keep the bugging away, the truck driver informed the whole episode to the mental patient and gave a helpless look.

The patient just laughed at the truck driver and said you just cannot even fix such a simple problem? “No wonder you are destined to remain a truck driver for life”.

The truck driver was astonished to hear such a compliment from a mental guy. “Here is what you can do” said the mental guy… “take one bolt from each of the remaining 3 tyres / wheels and fix it on to this tyre. Then drive down to the nearest workshop and replace the missing ones. Isn’t it simple my friend”.

The truck driver was so impressed with this quick fix answer and asked the patient “How come you are so smart and intelligent and you are here at the mental hospital?”

The patient replied “Hello friend! I stay here because I am crazy but not stupid”.

No wonder, there are some people, who behave like the Truck Driver, thinking that others are just stupid. So, guys, though you all are learned and wise, but, just watch out, there could be some CRAZY guys in our professional / personal lives, who could give us lot of quick fixes and brush our wisdom.

(Moral of the story :

Just do not conclude that you know everything and do not judge people by mere looks/ attire stature or academic background!)

BE CAREFUL

A couple of days ago as I returned from market, guard at gate stopped me as he wanted to ask something. He told me that he had received a sms telling that he had been selected for first prize of Rs 2 lacs. On my query he confirmed that he had not purchased any lottery ticket or sent an entry by post or taken part in any competition. He further added that when he replied to that sms he was asked to deposit Rs 20 thousand in a particular account so his prize can be sent. He replied in negative on my asking if he had deposited that amount. He requested for my advice. I told him not to ever fall for such ruses adding that these are frauds and he would have lost his money had he deposited it.

This took me back by almost ten years. I had received a mail from a very reputed bank that I have been selected for award of Rs 5 lacs for my regular usage of e-mail account. It was really tempting so I replied as to what was to be done by me to receive this amount. I was asked to give my account number with bank name and branch etc. Being little cautious, I gave the information of one of my dormant accounts which had just about Rs 100. I received a reply that the money will be transferred to that account on receipt of Rs 50 thousand as tax on prize money which they have to pay to income tax department. I was given an account number of a private bank. I asked as to why that amount cannot be deducted from Rs 5 lacs and balance sent to my account. I was told that it was not as per their policy and I need to pay first. Now I knew that it was all fraud. I visited the said bank and got name of account holder with his address & telephone number by making a palatable story. I called that number and gave him my piece of mind saying that I am informing the police.

These kind of messages have gone up a lot since then. Not a day goes when I do not receive either a mail or sms about similar awards. I just delete the mails or sms without even bothering to read. Shocking is that names of very reputed organizations are used by such persons.

Now I found another way of fraud by such persons. I was on internet when pop up from a reputed organization url came informing that I can win a prize by answering just a few simple questions. Out of curiosity I clicked on NEXT to be informed that there were 4 cars costing Rs 5 lacs on payment of just Rs 50 thousand as first prize, 6 Smartphones costing Rs 40 odd thousand on payment of Rs 999 as second and similarly more items as third & fourth prizes. I answered the questions. I was then informed that first prizes have all gone and there are just 2 Smartphones left asking if I was keen. On my confirmation, I was asked to give my address where the said phone could be sent and asking me to pay the said amount online. Now I knew that I would be bidding goodbye to my money. I gave my address asking them to courier it on To Pay Basis and received no confirmation. So I just closed the link. I find more such offers at times.

I suggest that be careful of such tricks of depriving you of your money.     

ETIQUETTES WHILE KEEPING PETS

How does it feel when a big dog like this charges at you? We have been keeping dogs for a long time, over 30 years now, not counting my childhood time when my parents also had dogs. I do understand them and can to an extent control even an unknown dog, though I got bitten once by a small one at my friend’s place when I was petting him as he was sitting close to me and rubbing his body against my legs.

I take our dog for walks after her meals. We keep her free at home, no collar even but when we take her out we always keep her on leash though she is a small one – Cocker Spaniel.

I meet a lot of other persons also walking their dogs and most of the times as we greet each other, even by wave of hand, we find that even our dogs wag tails looking at each other.

Recently I found a gentleman walking his German Sheppard without leash. I know that they respond to commands very well but still as curious animal they too would like to come closer to other pets. This dog charged at us and even ignored master’s calls. As he came closer I said NO in raised voice. He stood about a couple of feet away from us. Our dog seemed frightened and was cowering behind me. There is a school nearby that place where a lot of small children are on the road walking to school. What would happen if some child gets scared and runs? Would that dog not charge after that child? Why don’t people take these possibilities in view when they unleash their dogs? I had no option but to tell that person forcefully to keep his pet on leash when on walk.

This reminded me of another incident which happened almost 25 years ago. I had gone to a cloth show room. As I was looking for what I wanted a huge Labrador came to me and started sniffing at my legs. I knew that he must be getting smell of our dog. I spoke to him in friendly tone and he got on his hind feet putting his front paws on my shoulders making efforts to lick my face. All this while he was wagging tail madly. Everyone in the shop was scared. His master came in and took charge. He happened to be a known person staying in our locality. I advised him not to leave his dog free like that in market as a lot many persons would get scared.

I strongly feel that if you keep a pet, you have to take other’s reactions also into account.