These two are old posts which I had put up at my o3 space. I am reproducing these here with updates for your views.
Who am I?
When I retruned from office on a Saturday evening I told my family that next day I am taking them out for lunch to celebrate my promotion. All of them were very happy and eager to go out next day. We had dinner and as usual I took dogs for walk before going to bed at about 10:30 pm. While drifting off to sleep I was thinking of where to go and what all to order. I went to sleep in happy mode. It was at about 3 am that I felt little uneasy and in the next 3 hours I visited toilet at least 5 times to be sick or clear upset tummy each time. It was food poisoning. By morning I was so down that I could not get out of bed. I just lay there the whole day floating between disturbed sleep or dazed wakefulness. I could not bring myself to take anything even water. It was during this state my mind kept asking me WHO AM I? Not in filmy style “ Mein kaun hoon or mein kahan hoon” but in reality. Ok, I as per my own thinking am an important cog in the wheel called family or even organisation I work for but can I control my own time? Can I do what I plan? The answer was NO. I realized that there is someone who is much stronger than me which controls my moments. We may call it Force or Nature. This is what makes things happen in my life or for that matter in anyone’s life. I remembered an incident which happened years ago. On a Sunday lot of visitors had gone to Qutab Minar to have an outing. Those days it was allowed to go up the Minar. There were a lot of persons who were going up or coming down the stairs. At that time some reckless prankster shouted “ Saanp, Saanp ( Snake, Snake ) ”. There was a melee and in that stampede few lives were lost and many more injured. Now is it not that Force or Nature which brought them there that day? Some of you may say it was their destiny. But what made that destiny? Is it not that Force or Nature? We define this Force or Nature as God and call it by different names. We offer prayers in different ways to God we believe in. While we pray in our manner we also tend to look down upon those who do so differently. Do we have right to do so? Is that Force or Nature whom we refer as God in our own ways not only ONE but worshipped in many different ways? I realized that I am nothing but a mere speck on the big canvas called Universe. If all of us specks are in harmony it is a BEAUTIFUL PICTURE but if we are not so then it is a BIG UGLY JUMBLE OF SPECKS. I realized that as a speck who wants to be a part of BEAUTIFUL PICTURE it is my duty to spread love and tolerance to other specks around me. I felt that those who spread hatred or spit fire for killing actually are those who are unsure of themselves, are not confident about the way they pray, do not see the God they believe in as actual reality. Does God , no matter how or in what way we pray, ever tell us to hate someone or kill someone in God’s name? Should we all not answer this question honestly - “WHO AM I?”
This may be called a sequel to my last post. We all have egos. Some of us can control it and some let it control us. Those who fall in the later category believe in their larger than life image as per their perception. They feel nothing can go against their wishes or dictats. What happens when their egos get pricked? They go beyond reasoning. Two recent news items come to my mind. Not casting aspertions on anyone I just wish that we all try and understand what happened or could have happened. First is that Kolkata case involving a rich businessman and second is Hyderabad case of famous filmstar. In both these cases the main persons were so involved in pursueing their passion boosted by their egos, one for making money and other to retain his fame, that they had no time to interact with their children as fathers. If they had been close to them, they would have known what is in store. So when what happened happened their egos were pricked? So what is the result? Events that followed point to erratic behavior on their part. Fortunately second case finally had amicably ending.